Abdal says ‘Everyone knew I needed help … they failed me’
All names and identifying details have been changed.
Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
Abdal had an extremely difficult childhood and his behavioural problems led to him being taken into care.
He describes a catalogue of abuse, some perpetrated on him, and some that he witnessed being done to other children.
Abdal explains that he had learning difficulties and was bullied at school. In his anger and frustration, he began to fight back and was excluded from school for fighting. He was sent to an education unit and excluded from there.
By the age of 11, Abdal was staying out with older boys until the early hours of the morning, ‘smoking crack’ and being picked up by the police. He started committing offences and was removed from his family home and placed into the care system.
Abdal moved around different children’s homes, often running away. He was frequently sexually, physically and emotionally abused in these places, and saw other children being abused.
In one children’s home, Abdal says, a male member of staff started coming into his bedroom at night. When he shouted in protest, the staff used this as an excuse to restrain him for ‘being violent’. On one occasion, they stripped him naked.
He relates how one member of staff would take boys out on the pretext of teaching them to drive in his car. This man took Abdal out and during the ‘lesson’, put his hands down the boy’s trousers and touched his genitals.
Abdal remembers being sexually abused by two more male members of staff in the care system.
He says that every time he ran away and was picked up by the police, he would tell them about the physical and sexual abuse, but no one believed him – he was seen as a trouble maker.
Abdal feels that he was badly let down by the care and education systems. He says ‘They just set me up for destruction … I still feel like I’m being failed to this day’.
He was not able to read until he spent time in prison and taught himself. He suffers with his mental health and is looking for help and support through counselling. He has considered suicide but says the thought of his children helps him to keep fighting.
Abdal has several suggestions to improve the system to help prevent other young people going through similar experiences. He would like children to have one social worker, as far as possible, so they are not passed from one to another.
He says that professionals must listen to children and provide a long-term structure for them. He wants to see more funding for support and counselling for troubled young people, and more comprehensive checks on staff who come into contact with them.