Alberto wants to share his experience because he believes abuse is endemic in the church
All names and identifying details have been changed.
Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
Alberto was nine years old when his father died. Soon after this loss, relatives persuaded him to get involved with church activities.
A vicar took advantage of his vulnerability and sexually abused him.
Alberto began attending Sunday school and joined the choir with his cousins. Lessons were held on weekday evenings at the church, and the vicar started asking him to stay behind afterwards.
This was frightening for the young boy. He says that the vicar implied he was being kept behind as a punishment for being badly behaved. He describes him as ‘not a nice looking guy’ and remembers he was ‘frothing at the edges of his mouth’.
The vicar used to beat Alberto on his bare backside with different implements. As the abuse escalated, he began simulating sex with him.
The abuse continued, occurring a couple of times a week until Alberto was in his teens and old enough to refuse to go to church. He didn’t tell his mother the reason why.
Alberto believes the vicar took advantage of him as he had no father. He describes going home at night unhappy and not being able to tell anyone. He says ‘Things weren’t talked about then’.
He suffered another tragic blow when his mother died while he was still young. His grandparents cared for and comforted him, but he didn’t tell them he was being abused because he didn’t want them to be involved.
Added to this, he says he felt embarrassment and shame, and was sure he wouldn’t be believed as it was the vicar he would be accusing.
Alberto has since told his wife a little about the abuse, but no one else until he came to the Truth Project. He says the way the church works is ‘Jobs for the boys, looking after each other and letting it go on’. He never had anything to do with organised religion after he was abused.
He thinks there should be mentors available for children, and people trained to ‘know what's happening and recognise the signs’. He adds that abusers should be made accountable and brought to justice.
Alberto believes he has coped with what has happened to him.