Beau thought no one would believe that such a respected figure was sexually abusing him
All names and identifying details have been changed.
Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
Beau endured three years of sexual abuse by a Catholic priest who groomed him and his parents.
He says he has ‘buried’ what happened for nearly 50 years, and this has made things difficult for him and his family.
Beau explains that he attended a Catholic secondary school. In his first year, he recalls coming home one day to find his parents talking with a priest. Father Peter worked at his school, but Beau had not met him before.
The priest became a regular visitor to Beau’s home; his parents were very welcoming towards him and he became part of their family life. Over time, Father Peter began offering to babysit for Beau and his siblings. After this period of grooming, the priest began sexually abusing Beau.
The first time this happened, Father Peter bathed Beau and his brother and helped them change into their pyjamas. While doing this, he touched them inappropriately.
From then on, the priest sexually assaulted Beau at any opportunity. Beau describes one night when the abuse escalated beyond touching. He says the priest put him to bed and ‘some horrible things happened’.
Father Peter was always present at Beau’s school and he would attend school trips and retreats. On these occasions the priest would often give the children alcohol. Beau relates how on one trip, on the pretext of a punishment, Father Peter made him sleep in his bed. Beau says he was so desperate to get away he tried to jump out of the window, but the priest pulled him back and sexually abused him.
In between the school trips, Father Peter continued visiting Beau’s home. He arranged with Beau’s parents to give him piano lessons, and used this as another opportunity for sexual abuse. Beau comments that what began as fondling proceeded to ‘the full horror’.
He describes one of the most frightening things that happened to him was the priest taking him to a strange house, where two other men were present. Beau was plied with alcohol and left with the men, but he managed to get away.
Some years after the abuse ended, a disclosure was made by another boy about the priest and he left the parish. No one ever spoke to Beau about this.
Beau now questions why he never said anything at the time, but he also remembers feeling that no one would believe him because the priest was such a respected man. He adds that the abuse made him feel ‘dirty’ and he worried how his parents would cope if they knew.
The impact of the abuse on Beau has been significant. He has abused alcohol and drugs and attempted suicide. He has problems sleeping and suffers with mood swings and feelings of shame. He is troubled by disturbing memories.
He no longer has any faith in the Catholic Church.
Beau says it is important that children are given age-appropriate sex education from an early age, and should be reassured that they will be believed if they report incidents of sexual abuse to people in authority.
He concludes by saying he has found it helpful to talk about his experience after so many years.