James describes frequent abuse by a teacher at his school, with other staff ignoring the problem
All names and identifying details have been changed.
Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
James endured repeated sexual abuse over several years by a teacher at his boarding school.
He firmly believes that children should not be sent away to school.
James was sent to boarding school when he was eight years old. His mother was an alcoholic and he was seen as having ‘behavioural problems’.
He remembers his first impression of the teacher, Mr Jones, who later sexually abused him. He relates ‘The first time I met him, he just came over as such a friendly, nice person’.
The abuse started after Joe-James had been at the school for about six months. On the first occasion Mr Jones came into Joe-James’s room when he was in bed. The teacher shouted at him, then ‘gave me a bit of a beating’.
When it was over, James got back into his bed. Some time later, Mr Jones returned, got into bed on top of James and sexually abused him. James says the teacher did not rape him but he rubbed himself up against James.
James says ‘I’m sure I don’t need to say how horrific it was’.
He describes his confusion about being beaten, then abused. ‘I didn’t know what was going on … I thought he was being nice to me … it was very confusing.’
Mr Jones sexually abused James in this way several times a week for about two years. Sometimes he took James to his own room and abused him. Once when this occurred, another teacher knocked on the door, looking for James. Mr Jones claimed that James was with him because he was ill, and the teacher went away.
James comments that Mr Jones ‘was always so sure of himself … that he could do it and get away with it’.
He adds that he was aware that Mr Jones sexually abused other boys in the school and he feels sure staff knew it too. It was a regular occurrence for children to run away from the boarding school. He says others ‘messed’ their beds so they would be left alone.
James describes being ‘groped’ once by another teacher. Mr Jones witnessed this and assaulted the teacher.
James also suffered physical abuse at the school. He says ‘Everything was so physical and aggressive there … the physical abuse was just as bad’.
James left the school before he was a teenager. About 30 years later, a police force contacted him because other victims and survivors abused by Mr Jones had come forward.
There was a court case, and the abuser was sent to prison for offences against several boys. Joe-James does not feel his sentence was long enough. He adds that seeing the man who abused him in court was ‘a terrible experience’.
He describes how he has been affected by his experiences as a child. As a teenager he became very rebellious and took extreme risks. He found it hard to maintain relationships, and says ‘All the nasty stuff inside me got in the way’.
James has suffered with depression and drank heavily for a time, but has now stopped this. He smokes cannabis ‘as a form of escape’.
James emphasises the importance of sex education. He says that he did not receive any at school and comments that perhaps if he had just understood what the word ‘abuse’ meant, he might have been able to tell someone what was happening.
He does not think children should be sent away to school. ‘I’d have thought by now they’d realise boarding schools are not a good thing’ he says.
James concludes ‘I still have a few problems in my life I can’t sort out because of this. I’ve been angry for a long time … carrying nasty baggage around for 40 years. I want to leave it all behind after today’.