Jensen

Jensen was sexually abused by a man who was lodging with one of his friends. 

When his mother told the police she was concerned, they said there was nothing they could do.

Jensen explains that he was eight years old when his father left home. After that, he grew up without many boundaries, and felt he was ‘the man of the house’.  

When he was 11, Jensen spent a lot of time with his best friend, Dan, who was the same age. Dan's family had a lodger, Nick, who slept in the same room as Dan. Dan confided in Jensen that Nick was sexually abusing him.

Jensen remembers going on a day trip with Dan, and seeing his friend and Nick masturbating each other at the back of the coach. After this, Nick invited Jensen to go on another trip. He says that he didn’t want to, but he felt ‘roped into going’. Nick abused him in the same way. 

Nick continued to take advantage of Jensen and Dan, offering them days out in return for sexual acts. Jensen now knows this was grooming, but he did not understand this at the time.

The sexual abuse by Nick went on for about four years. Jensen's mother became concerned about her son’s relationship with Nick and went to the police, but they said they could not help.

Jensen says he was still controlled and manipulated by Nick and he stayed in contact with him for a few more years. He feels now that he protected Nick to hide his own sense of guilt and shame, and that became a huge burden on himself. 

When Jensen was older he confronted Nick about what he had done, and made him confess he was a paedophile. He admits that he assaulted Nick. 

Jensen describes how the sexual abuse has continued to affect him throughout his life. He has abused drugs, he has problems with anger and anxiety, and he feels he is often over-sensitive about comments that are meant as jokes. 

He finds it difficult to trust people, but he says that talking about the abuse more recently has helped him.