Mivann says improvements to child protection may cost ‘but if children are unhappy it costs society later’
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Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
After his parents divorced Mivann went to live with relatives. But one of his guardians died, and other relatives in the house were abusing alcohol, so he was taken into care at the age of nine.
For five years he endured sexual abuse and extreme cruelty in two different children's homes.
Mivann grew up in an industrial city in England. He is of South Asian heritage, and he explains that it was part of his culture to be vegetarian.
Under the strict regime in the first children’s home, staff frequently punished the boys harshly and forced them to eat whatever was served to them. Mivann says ‘The food they put on your plate you had to eat … we don’t eat meat so I was sick quite a few times … you couldn’t buy anything else’.
Mivann recalls there were just under a dozen male residents ranging in age from five to 18 years and he describes an ‘age hierarchy’, with the older boys dominating the younger ones while staff did little to prevent this.
He was bullied by some of the older boys, and says that one of them ‘... forced me to do things to him ... I didn’t even know what it was. My family were conservative and didn’t talk about sex’.
Mivann explains that the sexual abuse included kissing, touching and masturbation, and later rape. If he tried to resist, the abuser got aggressive. He did try to report what was happening, but the staff ‘weren’t interested’.
He says that his schooling started to suffer and his grades dropped. Although it was known that he was in care, his absences were never queried. He ran away twice from the home, but was taken back both times by the police.
After this, Mivann was sent to another care home.
He describes how again, there was a wide age range among the children, with minimal supervision and little interest taken in their welfare by staff. He was so unhappy that he ran away dozens of times. Every time he was returned by the police and punished by being stripped naked and made to face the wall. He was about 12 years old, and he did not try and report what was happening because by this time he thought it was ‘normal’. He adds ‘It was not just me suffering ... other children too’.
Mivann endured this environment for another two years, until he was returned to live with relatives.
It was many years before he reported the sexual abuse he had suffered, partly because it took him a long time to understand the nature of what had happened. It was decided there was not enough evidence to proceed, but he says the police handled his report well and the fact that they believed him was helpful.
He describes how he has been affected by the abuse he endured as a youngster. The setback to his education affected his career prospects and he has financial difficulties. He has issues with eating.
He finds it difficult to trust people and to socialise. He struggles with relationships and is single, and says his experiences have made him watchful of young members of his extended family.
He feels he was let down by the care system which left him vulnerable to bullying and abuse, and the police who never asked why he ran away so often.
Mivann suggests several ways to improve protection of children in care. He thinks the age range of residents living together should be limited to avoid bullying and control by older children.
He says staff should be caring and respectful of children and emphasises the importance of close and regular supervision. There should be an independent person for children to talk to, and any complaints should be logged.
He also feels the benefits system should acknowledge the debilitating effects of childhood abuse. Having to regularly recount the difficulties it causes creates further distress for victims and survivors.
Mivann concludes that although he still has battles to fight, he has found the strength to accept what happened to him. He adds ‘I’m very resilient’.