When Pierce disclosed abuse by Catholic priests, his family sided with the church against him
All names and identifying details have been changed.
Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
The Catholic church had great influence and control over Pierce’s family and community.
He was sent to a small religious college, which put him at the mercy of a group of sadistic and abusive priests.
Pierce grew up in a working class Catholic family. They lived in a close-knit community where most of the men were employed in the local industry.
Pierce found writing difficult. As an adult, he has been diagnosed with dyslexia, but in his childhood his family and teachers called him ‘lazy … the word used to describe anyone who appeared to be bright verbally but was less than average in written tasks’.
Pierce thinks that this judgement of him was a reason why it was decided he had expressed an interest in the priesthood. He says ‘This is not true’ and adds ‘Throughout all the major events of my childhood I was never in control of anything’.
At the age of 11, he was sent to a residential school run by an order of priests. He had previously visited the school and at first had no reason to think that he would not be happy there.
However, soon after Pierce arrived, the harsh culture of the school became apparent. He was subjected to an ‘initiation ceremony’ which ended with him being thrown blindfolded into a bed of nettles, and left to find his way back to school in the dark, terrified and in pain. He is sure that the priests were aware of this, because they told the new boys that they would be taking part in a ‘ceremony’.
The priests inflicted violent punishments on the boys. Every Sunday, the boys who they considered had not performed well that week were beaten with a leather belt. Pierce was a regular victim of this physical abuse.
He also endured sexual abuse by one of the priests, Father Green, who would grab him from behind and touch his genitals. On one occasion Father Green also attempted to digitally penetrate Pierce. Pierce describes the priest making strange groaning noises as he did this, and adds ‘He was not very tall but was much taller and stronger than a very small eleven-year-old.’
When Father Green abused him, Pierce would always try to fight back, struggling to break free before running away to find safety with the other boys. One of the school prefects warned Pierce never to be alone with the priest, so he thinks it must have been widely known that he was an abuser.
Pierce tried to tell another one of the school’s priests about Father Green, but this man told Pierce not to waste his time.
It was many years before Pierce felt able to disclose the truth of what had happened to him at the school. He says he was totally supported by his wife, but his parents and other family members turned against him as a result.
Their attitude did not change, even when Father Green was later sent to prison for sexually abusing several boys, including Pierce.
Pierce agreed to a charge relating to the abuse he suffered to be dropped, in return for Father Green pleading guilty to a lesser charge. This avoided the need for a trial but may have resulted in a reduced sentence for the priest.
He says he now greatly regrets taking what he sees as ‘the coward’s way’ by agreeing to the reduced charge. He also feels strongly that the priest who refused to listen to him when he tried to report the abuse should face criminal charges.
Pierce feels that the tradition of deference towards the church and its representatives partly explains why a blind eye was turned to the sexual abuse of children by some of these people.
He says ‘This was what kept me silent for so many years … knowing that you would never be believed … they succeeded for almost 25 years in keeping me silent’.
Pierce says that he has largely lost trust in the church, and he still suffers from low self-esteem because of the abuse and denigration he was subjected to. He says ‘No matter how hard I try there will always be a small part of me that still believes what the priests said to me’.
He has suffered with mental health issues, and has had some counselling. Although he thinks he can be overprotective with his own children, he has a close and loving relationship with them and his wife. He finds fulfilment in his work to support children with developmental disorders.