Torrie says she was a misfit at school, and this made her vulnerable to a predatory teacher
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Torrie grew up in a rural area and her parents relied on a teacher to supervise her after school until they could collect her.
He betrayed their trust and sexually abused Torrie.
Torrie explains that her parents were ambitious for her education and sent her to a school some distance from where the family lived. This meant she was socially isolated because she lived far away, and that she could not play with other children after school.
She adds that she was a ‘quirky kid’ who struggled to fit in due to an undiagnosed condition.
Her parents worked long hours and could not collect her when the school day ended. Instead, they made an arrangement with the headmaster, Mr Smith, that he would drive Torrie to his house and they would collect her from there.
During these journeys, the teacher began sexually abusing her. She remembers the colour and model of his car, and how he would touch her leg and put his hand up her skirt when he was driving.
At school, Mr Smith started picking Torrie to have ‘special’ reading sessions. She had to go to his office every day and stand beside his desk. While she was reading, he would put his hand inside her knickers. She remembers that while he was doing this, he kept up a commentary on her reading, as if nothing else was happening.
The following year, Torrie managed to stop the abuse by taking up an after school activity. She persuaded her parents that she could wait to be collected by them so she didn’t have to go to Mr Smith’s house.
In her teenage years, Torrie was bullied and her parents were worried about her behaviour. They sent her for counselling with a vicar but she did not tell him about the abuse because it made her uncomfortable that ‘he was a man in a position of authority’.
She says she had ‘horrible’ sexual experiences during her adolescence that made her feel revolted and shamed. To protect herself from sexual advances, she cut her hair and wore loose baggy clothing; she says she hated herself.
At university, Torrie was sexually assaulted by a male student and dropped out soon after.
In later years, she got married, but the relationship broke down and Torrie believes this was caused by the impact of the abuse she had experienced.
Memories of the sexual abuse came back to her in recent years after an incident triggered her. She now experiences flashbacks and is afraid of remembering too much detail. Torrie has told her mother about the abuse and says she is supportive; her mum says she ‘knew something had happened but wasn’t sure what’.
Torrie thinks that parents should be more aware and educated about the danger of child sexual abuse, and should not allow their children to be alone with adults in authority.