A teacher appointed himself as Wayne’s ‘protector’, then sexually abused him
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Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
Wayne was subjected to child sexual abuse at the hands of several perpetrators at the all-boys boarding school he attended.
The abuse he first experienced was by other pupils. Then a teacher who claimed he would protect Wayne also abused him.
Wayne was 10 years old when he was first abused by another, slightly older boy, Tim, who got into his bed and touched his genitals. After a few months, Wayne told the housemaster what was happening and he spoke to Tim.
For a time, Tim left Wayne alone, but then the abuse resumed until Wayne told his parents. The other boys in Wayne’s year heard he had reported Tim, and he was bullied as a result.
During Wayne’s second year at the boarding school he was in a different house. Another older boy, Rob, sexually abused Wayne in the same way that Tim had. Again, Wayne reported it to the housemaster in charge, Mr Jones, and again, he was bullied and called homophobic names by other boys. Even some of the teachers joined in this verbal abuse.
Mr Jones assured Wayne he would protect him, and Wayne says that no other boys sexually abused him after that.
However, he was betrayed by Mr Jones, who exploited his role as Wayne’s ‘protector’ to groom him. The housemaster also built a good relationship with Wayne’s parents over the phone, so they trusted him. Wayne says ‘He obviously used his position to great effect’.
Mr Jones began inviting Wayne to his room and over a few weeks, he showed the boy pornographic magazines and videos. The housemaster then began to masturbate Wayne, perform oral sex on him and after about six months, he raped him.
This sexual abuse continued for about four years. Wayne comments that he saw it ‘almost like a relationship’. He says he knew that what the other boys had done to him was wrong, but it was more difficult to recognise that Mr Jones was abusing him, because he was a trusted adult.
‘He was the one who was supposed to be looking after me and so it made me feel protected’ Wayne says.
The abuse stopped when Wayne was 16 and he left the school.
He did not tell his parents about the abuse by Mr Jones, because they were going through some difficulties at the time.
When Wayne was in his mid-20s, he decided to report Mr Jones to the police. By this time, Mr Jones was working abroad but the police arrested him and interviewed him.
‘Of course he denied everything’ Wayne says. He was told there was insufficient evidence to charge him. ‘That was the last I heard of it.’
Wayne was satisfied with the police investigation but he thinks the follow-up information they gave him could have been better, and he would like to have been offered some support.
He feels he was completely failed by his school. There were no safeguarding systems in place and he was not protected from bullying when he disclosed the abuse by Tim and Rob; instead a teacher took advantage of his vulnerability.
Wayne is not sure if anyone knew about the abuse by Mr Jones, but he says that the teacher would sometimes come and get him from his dorm at night and occasionally he would go to Mr Jones’s room.
He comments generally about boarding schools; ‘In environments like that there are opportunities for predators to do what they do and as a child it is hard to then speak out …’.
Wayne would like to be sure that safeguarding in boarding schools has improved since he attended one.
Wayne feels that until the point that he reported the abuse to the police, he had ‘coped well’, but he developed mental health difficulties after this. He says ‘I had some very dark thoughts’. He had therapy and the problems subsided after a few months.
He finds it difficult to show emotion, although he adds that the process of sharing his experience made him feel quite emotional.
Wayne says he has realised there is a stereotypical view that people who have been sexually abused will go on to abuse others themselves. He is horrified by this perception.
He says his wife is very supportive and he enjoys being a father. He feels that he has processed his experiences and that he is resilient.