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IICSA published its final Report in October 2022. This website was last updated in January 2023.

Experiences shared

Experiences shared

These are some of the experiences of child sexual abuse shared with the Truth Project by victims and survivors. All names and identifying details have been changed.

Download a PDF sample of accounts

Emily felt in a permanent state of fear and worthlessness during her childhood

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Emily describes how she endured extreme physical and emotional abuse by her mother, which caused chaos in her life and led to her being sexually abused.

Continually threatened and tortured at home, Emily says she felt scared and unloved. She recalls that when she was about seven years old, she stole £1 from her mother, who threatened to cut off one of her fingers with a large knife.

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Rather than feeling he wants revenge on the man who abused him, Digby says that he feels pity

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Digby describes the sustained sexual abuse he was subjected to at a prestigious boarding school as ‘grim’. 

However, he adds ‘It has shaped my life in a way that some good has come out of it’.

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Ronan says it is important to him to be believed about what happened 50 years ago

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Ronan says that from an early age, he was seen as a ‘problem child’ and was sent to live with relatives. 

When his older cousin sexually abused him, he was punished for complaining about it and told he was lying.

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Helena feels proud of the way she is dealing with the effects of being abused as a child

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Helena was sexually abused by some older cousins, and then by her father.

She was not protected by social services, the care system or the police.

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Samson’s experiences have made him very cautious about where his children are and who they are with

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Samson was abused by a man called Mick who made friends with his family and won their trust by taking Samson and a friend to the park.

But these outings that the boys enjoyed turned out to be a grooming exercise so that Mick could abuse them.

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Ellie was let down by social services, who sent her to live with a sexual abuser

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Ellie and her sister were neglected by their parents and placed in care.

She feels they were equally neglected by the local authority, who failed to protect them from abuse.

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Neve says ‘I see child sexual abuse as a power issue and I would like to see recognition of that’

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Neve was the youngest sibling in a large family and she describes an atmosphere of ‘loyalty, sharing and looking after each other’ during her childhood in the 1960s and 70s.

But sexual abuse by an in-law, inflicted on her as a young girl, and later another family member, has taken its toll on close family bonds. It has also left Neve feeling guilty that she should have done more to stop the abuser.

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Gareth was put in care to protect him from a violent father, but this did not keep him safe from sexual abuse

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Gareth was five years old when he was removed from the family home. He was given several placements, including two different foster carers, one of whom mentally abused him.

At the next children’s home he was sent to, he was sexually abused for four years by Ron, the officer in charge.  

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Douglas says ‘Victims need justice – it is not about money’

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Douglas describes a childhood of bullying, fear and sexual abuse at the hands of those who should have cared for and protected him.

As a young boy, Douglas sustained a brain injury. As a result, his behaviour changed and his mother found it hard to manage him. She approached social services and Douglas was placed in a residential assessment centre. He remembers trying to run away on the day he first arrived and being placed alone in a secure cell.

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She was let down by some professionals, but Frida praises the care she received from others

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Frida and her mum spent time living in a women’s refuge, where she was sexually abused by a teenage boy.

She says the staff at the refuge were ‘brilliant’ but that more care and attention should have been given to safeguarding.

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Kristen suffered cruelty from her foster mother and sexual abuse from her foster father

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Kristen was placed with a foster family because her mum had significant mental health difficulties and was unable to care for her. 

She suffered emotional, physical, racial and sexual abuse while in foster care. Her social worker did not respond to possible signs of abuse, such as bruises on Kristen. 

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‘Abuse is classless and all children should be believed’ says Gerry

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Gerry lived with his parents and two older brothers. He went to a local preparatory school and he describes being ‘picked on by the masters’ and how this affected his self-esteem.

He experienced more extreme bullying from other pupils when he was sent to boarding school, and he believes this may have made him vulnerable to the sexual abuse that he suffered at the hands of one of the teachers.

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